Motivation : Getting The Very Best Out Of Yourself

So our planned post about socials communities is on hold! Because we wanted to uncover the core of your motivation.

We had the chance to speak to an individual yesterday with a valid goal and a thought out process but a fear of letting go of the past and accepting the positive of their future.

No one, repeat no one can motivate you.

Oh you can be inspired no doubt and the inspiration from a person or event can be highly emotionally charged and resonate so powerfully that you can't help but move forward with your goals. But unless you have discovered within the motivation that is self generated and as such self perpetuating then that brick wall looms large and fast approaching.

The pre game address from a great orator and coach can get you running onto the field revved up and that adrenalin rush leads to action that can get results fast. What happens when things get tough? In that third quarter of the game? Do the words in that pre game address cause our second wind, those heroic efforts that change the course of the game? Or is it what is inside use that leads to winning or just missing out?

Think about where you are right now.....in your business, in your sales year, in your relationship, in your friendships, in your life. Now imagine it is your third quarter in the game you are playing but the final whistle sounds now....that's it....game over.....where have you finished?

In your business have you achieved what you wanted? Are you ahead / behind?

In your sales year ....what percentage of target have you finished on.....is it 90% or is it 110?

In your relationship.....what have you missed out on doing that you regret...should you have proposed, started a family, said "I love you"......or should you have exited the relationship here, here, here and there!!

In your life.....do you look back and smile...satisfied.....or is there so much more you wish you could have done?

Now how does this all feel?

So you finished on 90%. Could you have made 100%, 110%? What more could you have done, differently, the same with more consistency ....if you had just more time what would you do to feel....better?

How does 90% feel knowing 110% was there if you had just tried that little bit more? If the voice in your head was less concerned about fear and more concerned about sending you positive messages.

And what if you are on 110% how does that feel? And knowing how good that feels...how does it positively change things for you and your world....what are the consequences of hitting your goal....so what do you need to do to capture that feeling, bottle the very essence of it....what would you do to make sure, guarantee you are going to feel that way.....and extra sales call a day .....?

So what if you should have spent more time with your family...one more hug, one more "I love you" that you should have said....or maybe your priorities are spot on and you know they know just how much you love them as you never left that to chance.

Understanding how you feel on reaching that future goal, what it would mean, what would change in your world ....is the first step in visualising and outcome to provide positive motivation to keep you on track ...you need to imagine how it feels emotionally and physiologically.....only then can you synthesise your body and mind to delivering that goal for you. The movie of your life becomes inherently positive ...it's the slide set you want shown at your funeral the movie you want to see over and over again. It's the Disney feel good, rising above the odds story.....not the B grade unlikeable character that no one warms to or respects...."I hated that guy in that film"....is that who you want to be?

But here's the rub. There is no finish line. When the final whistle blows, there is another game starting. There is always something else to work towards. Once you accept that then you are ready to accept that if you live your life like the final whistle is about to blow and as such make every second count then you can live without regret, able to smile at your efforts, reflect warmly and without questioning what if.

Finally this quote from poet Kim Rosen may resonate for you ...."when you welcome what you've been running from, your life is no longer shaped by trying to avoid it"......visualising the ideal you and working towards it is a great first step.

Women, Motivation, Fear of Success, and Being Real

PCE is surrounded by lots of strong women. Gutsy, determined, motivated, fearless. Be it business or socially, at community and social groups : they are there : fighting. Fighting for a dream, a goal, sometime for sanity, for love, for what they believe in. These women are achievers.

But why is it that studies of achievement motivation do not predict the level of achievement motivation for females as well as these studies do for males?

Women often obtain higher test-anxiety scores than males. Are they just more anxious?

Maybe there is another explanation. Have females in our culture (Western) been encouraged to be successful, whilst also trying to live up to conventions : the good daughter, the dutiful wife, the multi tasking mother?

Is there a motive to avoid success and fear it : as women battle with convention?

Evidence from psychological studies shows exactly that. That fear of success or success avoidance is heightened when anxiety is present about breaking with convention or especially in relationships : being competitive with a male partner.

Differences in achievement therefore has nothing to do with ability but with culturally imposed sex differences in motivation.

Regardless of how strong and fierce the women PCE knows are: there is something to remember.....like all people recognition, being valued, being supported, sense of purpose and support is critical.

Men have built support mechanisms for all of this : the workplace, the social culture of the workplace, the weekly boys night on a Friday.....and dare I say it ....golf.....

What's missing for women are these conventions and more : the conflict over dual roles requires a sense of purpose more clearly defined PLUS the support mechanisms from a partner of : the freedom to speak and communicate and be heard, and task mutuality ....ie doing things together that produce results: small wins here a key.

There are rules of engagement required. But women of the world hear this : be crystal clear about your WHY. Craft it, be specific, clear and then articulate it. Share it. Live it.

Above all once you have that clear purpose that is about you and you get the support to fulfil it...you can afford to be fierce, fearless and driven....and all the rest will follow, because you have nurtured yourself first and when you are feeling like you are breaking through you really can do anything.

Passion, Flow and Meaningfulness - Your Business Plan for 2012

We've taken a deviation from the latest series of topics (which have been focussed on sales pitches and presentations using the engagement techniques we've promoted).

The reason is that there are no techniques, no presentations, no silver bullet to sales, and the development of your small business in the professional insurance, financial planning and financial services space if you do not have the motivation and well-being suited to managing your work efforts and direction.

Richard Sisely, New Zealand Journal of Employment Relations, 35(2), 28-40, looked at the issue of motivation and the facilitation of autonomous motivation and its impact on well being.

Sisley wrote that intrinsic motivation had a high connection with relationships built on trust, empathy and stability.

Hang on a second. Isn't that what you are trying achieve as a professional financial planner and insurance adviser?

Tell me more!!

Sisely also then expanded and suggested that striving for self-determined goals (such as your plans for 2012 in your business) is connected with well-being and a determinant of a daily positive mood.

I'm liking the sound of this especially in the current economic climate!

Because this has implications for your business and in turn your clients.

First in your business this has implications for staff selection and for the assignment of roles/tasks in your business.

If you've read the E -Myth, or done a sticky note exercise where you look at all the tasks in your business and who does them.....and who should be doing them...then you understand where this is heading.

You need with these tasks as Sisely describes to assign a value identification with them. You need to take your staff on the journey of the validity of the task and the impact on the client.

This leads to better client engagement and outcomes.

What about you and your motivation and your passion?

Passion according to Sisley has a correlation with work satisfaction, well-being, and less stress.

Passion is critical. What in 2012 are you passionate about? Share it. Document it. Write it on a wall (or whiteboard). Share it with your clients. Make yourself accountable to your passion.

Flow, or the optimal experience (read effectiveness and efficiency) brings with it positive moods. You are far more likely to take on those tasks that you already have attached validity to and that are assigned correctly when your passion is driving you. It's that feeling of, well for want of a better word....flowing.

Meaningfulness. My favourite of Sisely's writings, meaningfulness depends on your own values and that also means having a high enough emotional intelligence quotient that you can respect others values. EI is that ability to not only be aware of your own feelings and emotions but to then use that information to guide your actions (Hur et al, 2011).

And that's where a transformational leader can create a service climate of exceptional quality.

It is a palpable feeling that you get when you walk into a business that delivers excellence in the customer experience.

Can you learn EI? Yes there are courses. Maybe you can improve. It is said it improves with age...so you can wait I guess.

But if EI houses the qualities of empathy, motivation, self-awareness, trust, emotional stability and these are all qualities of a transformational leader then there is one thing you need to do.

Get up, walk to the mirror and ask yourself a few questions.

- what are you passionate about?
- are you ready to share that passion?
- what are your values?
- do you live them?
- what are the values of the people around you?
- do you know - do you ask them?
- do you act in a way that is true to your values?
- what can you do daily to develop empathy, motivation, self-awareness, trust, emotional stability

But most of all - get passionate!

Back to the presentation pitches next time