YES!!! You can have it all.
But there is a price to pay.
That price is the acceptance to create new positive habits.
Even further, you need once on the path to reinforce those new habits until they become crystallise.
And over all you need to decide what are the things you need to outsource and stop do them yourself!
This has become so evident for PCE. First you may notice its been a month since our last post. With meetings with key advisers, with travel, with conferences and presentations, something had to give!
And most importantly PCE made a choice to creat a new habit.
6am starts in the office, 8pm boxing and gym work : was not working!
Well at least it was not working for family. And PCE needed to step back at look at what was really important.
Factor in a new habit, 6am gym, 7.15am family time over breakfast, and then 7pm dinner and we are done for the night apart from conversation with loved ones. Easy? Not really, suddenly 2 to 3 hours of work time per day were sacrificed and there needed to be a solution?
Let us tell you about Jan and Phil. Phil owns a small business. Phil said to PCE he was battling : trying to me a good husband, father, businessman, boss, trying to keep finances on track, maintain the house, keep fit, maintain friendships, look after his staff......something's gotta give.
Phil was telling himself lots of stories.....
We readily notice what’s wrong in our lives and react to it automatically – often at a cost to more thoughtful deliberation and effectiveness. Our core emotional need is to feel secure valued and appreciated.
The more we feel our value is at risk the more energy and time we spend defending it and the less energy we have available to create value.
So we develop influence over the stories we tell .......
We can develop stories to empower us rather than undermine. When we react as a default to telling negative stories we assign ourselves to the role of victim. It feels better not to blame ourselves for disappointments The victim role undermines our power to influence our circumstances.
The alternative is to look for where our responsibility lies in any given situation and then take remedial action to influence what we can control.
Awareness is key: being curious about how we respond changes us from being the subject of our feelings to making them the object of our observation.
Realistic optimism balances a hopeful and positive perspective with a recognition that the desired outcome may or may not occur.
We often look to those that inspire us for guidance. For PCE Chris Gardner is a source of inspiration.
For Chris its about Spiritual Genetics : the conscious choice to embrace the spirit within yourself : to embrace the best within you.
It involves a choice to : let go of judgement, allow yourself to heal, accept that you can have it all, embrace lessons of the past and grow.
Accept that where you are now is where you need to be and move forward : empowered, can do attitude, tap into your ingenuity, with a sense of purpose, inspiration to face fears, with perspective, ask questions, get support, and have an unstoppable passion for life.
So create new habits, make change but do it positively and looking ahead, leaving what you can't control and focussing on what it really important and being accountable for where your responsibility lies.
Chris Gardner : Start Where You Are – Life Lessons in Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, 2010, Amistad.
Tony Schwartz: The Way We’re Working Isn’t Working, 2010, Free Press The Energy Project : www.theenergyproject.com/resources
Great Article Andy. I really liked your point about realistic optimism. Sometimes we can do our best, but still things don't work out. Then we have to go with the flow.
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